My Birthday

Since Dick was not in Scottsdale like he had planned to be and because he had already taken off of work and wouldn't be going to the office, not only was he home all morning, but he wouldn't get out of bed. This was going to be a problem. I needed to take a shower and get dressed. One of my friends was taking me out to lunch and I had to meet her at noon. The bathroom is in our bedroom which he has refused to vacate. We have been sharing this space and when he's cooperative, he'll leave the room so I can have privacy to bathe and dress. However, on this particular morning he made it clear, he wasn't going anywhere. I knew he was looking to start an argument. Before I answered him, the strangest image popped into my head. I saw myself dribbling a basketball at half court watching the time run out on the clock. At that moment I realized I was in control of the situation. I just needed to take take my time and not react immediately.

So instead of responding to him , which is what I knew he was hoping I would do, I starting humming a medley of Jason Mraz's songs while I gathered my towel, soap, shampoo, hair dryer, makeup and clothes. Appearing totally upbeat and jovial, I exited the room with a dance in my step and my belongings in my arms. Being completely inconvenienced, on my birthday no less, I took a shower in the kids bathroom and dressed in Josh's room. However, it was worth the hassle because I had the satisfaction of not letting Dick suck me into an argument with him. He was looking for a way to drag me down to his level and make sure he spoiled the anniversary of the day I was born. I didn't let him. Not only was I getting older, I was getting a little wiser as well.

I was happy to leave this bitter, angry, pitiful man behind to marinate his thoughts in the poison he concocted. I was also looking forward to starting my birthday celebration with a positive frame of mind . One of my closest friends was taking me out to eat at Lovell's of Lake Forest. This elegant restaurant in Lake Forest, IL is owned by James Lovell, the Apollo 13 astronaut and his family. It's a great place to celebrate a special occasion and I was definitely ready to do that.

Lunch was wonderful. It was so nice to sit, relax, talk and enjoy a delicious meal as if I didn't have a care in the world or a miserable man waiting to torment me when I got home. The hours passed by as if they were minutes. When we finally left the restaurant, it was time to start getting ready for dinner. It's really true what they say, "Time flies when you are having fun."

I was getting into the birthday spirit so I decided to stop at the local grocery store and treat myself to a birthday cake. As I was checking out, I mentioned to the cashier that today was my birthday and I had to buy myself my own cake. All of a sudden, she and her bagger assistant started singing me "Happy Birthday." I was so touched. Complete strangers were doing everything in their power to make me feel special on my special day.

I took Marni out for my birthday dinner to a cute little Italian restaurant. Of course we ate way too much and were completely stuffed. However, in honor of this special occasion, they brought out the most amazing homemade cannolis. We couldn't refuse them (it would have been rude!) so we forced ourselves to indulge. Marni encouraged me to make a wish before I blew out the candle. I think I sat there for several minutes with my eyes closed, praying for a long list of things I would love to come into my life. After dinner we went to the movie theater and saw Dear John. I'm a sucker for a sappy love story. However, after watching this film, it just reinforced to me what I didn't have in my life and how much I craved having a special guy celebrate my special day with me. When we came home, we were still filled to the brim from what we ate earlier. While we couldn't stomach the thought of eating another morsel, Marni put candles in my cake and sang me "Happy Birthday." Again, I closed my eyes, stood there for way too long as the wax from the illuminated flames effortlessly dripped down onto the frosting, wished for everything that's been missing from my life for far too long and blew out all the candles in one swift breath. We put the cake back into the fridge, knowing that the next day it would be consumed and enjoyed.

All in all it was a spectacular day. In addition to all the celebrating I did throughout the day, I was showered with phone calls, birthday cards, e mails and an outpouring of birthday wishes on Facebook. It was the best birthday I had in a long, long time. I went to sleep happy, content and feeling very lucky to have so many caring, loving people in my life.